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Wednesday, September 26, 2007

Campaña antimonárquica



Mi Felipín me dio un susto de muerte el otro día. Quería dimitir de Heredero.

-Yo me voy, Leta. Marchamos para Estados Unidos. Este país no me quiere.
-Pues yo de aquí no me muevo aunque no te quieran. Mi meta es ser la Reina de España.
-Voy a abdicar en Leonor.
-¿A abdicar de qué? Es tu padre, el Rey, el que tiene que abdicar, chaval.

Maripuri asomó su rubia cabeza para reñirme por llamarle a mi Felipín chaval. Quiere que hable como un miembro de la Real Academia. Mi doncella no entiende que mi misión es darle brillo y esplendor a la Corona, no al vocabulario.

Quien no le da mucho brillo a la institución monárquica es la niñera Rafaela. Anda por Cataluña quemando fotografías de Sus Majestades. Y no es la única traidora de Palacio, también el peluquero Hernán toma posiciones para sacar tajada de la III República.

-Los de "el país" me contrataron para escribir artículos cuando leyeron en mi currículum vitae "peluquero oficial de doña Letizia de España".
-¿Cuánto te pagan, Hernán? -le preguntó mi Felipín.
-Poquito, Alteza. Si vos no me pagáis, no llego a fin de mes.

Mi Felipín se derrumba en el sillón ikea. Nunca lo vi tan deprimido. Ni siquiera cuando le negaba mi mano, antes de la petición de boda, era tan pesimista.

-La Monarquía se acaba, Leta. Elena y Cristina tampoco quieren ser las Herederas. No resisten un país que nos hace vudú.
-¿Vudú? ¡Maripuri! Mira en esas cartas tuyas si estamos embrujados.
-Yo no hago magia negra.
-¡Mira en el tarot si nos clavan alfileres!

Mi doncella corre a esconderse en la cocina. Si algún día vienen los republicanos con la guillotina a La Zarzuela, Maripuri pedirá como último deseo un trozo de tortilla española.

Yo, en cambio, no tengo últimos deseos. Mi único deseo es ser la Reina. Y lo seré por muchas fotografías que quemen.

77 comments:

Nosotras mismas said...

Hola guapa,

No te preocupes, como decían dos periodistas por ahí (dueñas de la agencia Corpa), "Tú, serás mi reina"
La crisis monárquicas es algo cíclico que hay que pasar, como una mala gripe.

Besos de una plebeya con tacones.

Belén said...

No todos los republicanos somos así, querida Letizia, yo de echo estoy pensando que si es usted la futura reina, hasta soportaría un Borbón mas!!!! Así que dígale a su señor marido y Heredero de la Corona que algunos le queremos, pero déjele claro que es por usted, no por él...

Besos Plebeyos

juan rafael said...

Por muchas fotos que quemen, no pasa nada, nada más salir al portal os hacen ciento y la madre.
Es más la oferta que la demanda.
Saludos.

chuliMa said...

jajaja, Doña leti, no te preocupes que llegarás a donde desees con esa pluma y ese salero

shaluditos

Anonymous said...

Querida Princeza Letizia
Muito obrigada por assinar nosso livro de visitas.
Te queremos muito, não se desgaste com as opiniões momentâneas, isso passa... e você será uma linda e maravilhosa RAINHA!

FUERA DE SERVICIO said...

querida Princesa Letizia, es verdad que ustde seria la mejor reina del pueblo español y aunque tambien es cierto que si los pocos que te admiramos a ti y claro a la famila de borbones, es por ti eso que no te quede duda ya que tu beniste a darles ese toque especial que ni las infantas siendo lo que son lo pudieron lograr a y que quemen las fotos que quieran haber quien se cansa primero tu de seguir posando en estas o ellos de gastar gasolina en quemarlas y estar oliendo a plastico quemado digo les guste o no seras Reina de Ellos aunque no les guste......... cuidece mucho sumasjestad

Anonymous said...

Pero Alteza de que se preocupa ud. si las fotos que quemaron son de sus suegros, a ud. no la meten en lios...que este bien.

Besos de anonima.

SusM said...

Tranquila Doña Letizia,
Vd. reinará puesto que ya lo hace en los corazones de mucha gente.
Cuidese!! y cuide a esos dos bombones que tiene por hijas.

Anonymous said...

señora, no sabía que os habíais abierto un blog, es todo un honor poder visitaros y comentaros

ruego a vuestra alteza se digne visitar mi humilde casa, que es la vuestra también y la del

amor

:-)

Reina Letizia said...

Mis muy queridos súbditos

Amor: ¿cómo no voy a visitar tu casa si me ofreces amor? No hay nada más grande que el amor ni nada más necesario que el dinero y la salud para poder disfrutarlo con placer.

Morrigan: es muy bonito reinar en los corazones, pero también aspiro a reinar en el presupuesto.

Anónima: cariño, cuando queman las fotos de los suegros, la foto de la nuera es la última en quemarse, pero también se quema.

Milagros Muñoz: tienes toda la razón. Yo soy la salsa de la Familia Real.

RosaMaría: mis infantitas también firmarán tu libro de visitas cuando tengan edad de firma.

Chulima: tengo grandes ambiciones. Gracias por comprenderme.

Juan Rafael: temo que quemen también nuestras fotos privadas y nos quedemos sin una foto que enseñar a las visitas.

Belén: mi Felipín es consciente de que es amado por su Pueblo a través de mí. Por eso tiene celos.

Nosotras mismas: lo malo es que esta gripe parece una enfermedad crónica.

Besos de Princesa

mireias32 said...

Yo creo que lo que sería justo es que la familia real se liara la manta a la cabeza y se dedicara a quemar fotos de Carod
Besos de sábado
Lady Bourbon

Anonymous said...

Mira leti, yo el martes voy en BCN a la manifestación de Ciutadans, porque me caes de puta madre, porque ya sabes lo republicanona que soy yo.
Me ha encantado el comentario de Juan Rafael jajaja cojonut.
Besos mi reinona

El antifaz said...

No sé que decirte reina (perdona por la prisa). Si esto fuera una campaña contra la corona, se acabaría pronto. Pero no lo es. Subo a Barcelona de vez en cuando, y ayer estuve en Humilladero parra empadronarme. Así que la sabre se me está haciendo morada.
Por cierto, serías una pésima reina, como todas. ¿No te gusta más presidenta de la III República?
Tengo un regalo para tí (es de la semana pasada, pero no lo pude subir antes).
Un beso sin corona.

Anonymous said...

SiR
La Presidencia de la "III República" ya esta ocupada, por orden de la Princesa nuestra "Reina"; como mucho quedan "Ministerios"
Vasitos

Clarice Baricco said...

Princesa, tenga mucho cuidado porfavor.
Fue un honor su visita.

Le abrazo

Reina Letizia said...

Mis muy queridos súbditos

Calma: los priemros súbditos siempre sois los mejores por haber apoyado a esta Princesa antes de la tormenta de republicanismo que me va a lanzar al estrellato con la ayuda de mi doncella y la gracia de Dios. Seguiré todos tus consejos. Anoto el nombre de Cristina para mi tercera hija. Y gracias por ir a la manifestación de Ciutadans.

Clarice: tendré cuidado.

Sir Lejarza: ministerios va a haber mogollón. Tengo pensado unos cien o así.

El antifaz: dime reina, porfa, que me encanta.

Mireias: las fotos de Carod las quemamos en la intimidad. No lo digas por ahí.

Besos de Princesa

Paco Becerro said...

Querida Princesa, yo soy mucho más de usted que de sus suegros.

A ver si llegas pronto a reina...

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